The Fireball Gazette

Bear or Deva?
Their mission took them toward the Cliffside where Wilma’s father was being held, but the journey quickly turned into a chaotic skirmish when they were ambushed by what appeared to be a ferocious, unbridled beast. As the tension reached a breaking point, the bear transformed into Deva, revealing that the entire ambush was just a clever tactical ruse. Utilizing Deva’s shapeshifting abilities, the party drafted a plan for total infiltration. In her spider form, Deva scouted the perimeter like a stealth operative, mapping out the camp's layout. After spotting some Fort Murray uniforms, she signaled that it was time for a daring, high-stakes deception.

Mad Matt’s Wild Plan ability Mad Matt, a man who believes that unconventional thinking is the highest form of freedom, seized on Deva’s discovery. He dispatched Sir Spencer, his trusty monkey companion, to secure the stolen uniforms. Once they were geared up, Mad Matt devised an absolutely absurd plan to pose as a wounded soldier. To ensure his "war wounds" looked authentic and gritty, he insisted that Havi punch him - repeatedly - until he looked like he’d survived a heavy artillery barrage. With his injuries looking appropriately battered, Matt limped toward the guards, claiming to be Sergeant Matthew of the Fourth Cavalry, arriving with vital intelligence. He even added a gross touch of "combat fatigue" by vomiting on a guard, a move so visceral that the guards bought the story hook, line, and sinker, rushing him straight to the infirmary.

A Most Intriguing Story
After the camp doctor patched up Matt’s "battle-hardened" wounds, Matt insisted on being escorted to Commander Stein to deliver his high-level intel. Once inside the commander’s tent, Matt went full propaganda mode, reporting on the secret schemes of Lysander von Trümmbach. He claimed the Fort Murray government was secretly building a massive naval fleet that would decisively end the war in mere days if left unchecked. However, Matt got so caught up in the drama of his own storytelling that he completely forgot his crew were technically fighting on the opposite side of the conflict - they had been sent from Fairness to recover prisoners held in a Fort Murray camp. In short, the commander he was briefing was a direct subordinate of Lysander von Trümmbach and was decidedly unimpressed by this breach of international decorum. Luckily, Commander Stein chalked the nonsense up to a severe concussion and sent Matt back to the infirmary.

Taking Out the Guards
While Mad Matt was busy performing his one-man theater production, Mabel and Havi were executing their own brand of swift justice. Using magic to create a diversion, Mabel lured a guard into the shadows, allowing Havi to move in for a precision strike. Ever resourceful, Havi masked the evidence of the skirmish with a well-placed splash of vomit, maintaining their stealthy profile. Meanwhile, Deva, still in her spider form, accompanied Tiyana as they scavenged more uniforms to blend into the crowd.

Matt Unleashes Tentacles
Back in the infirmary, Mad Matt decided that being undercover wasn't nearly as much fun as total chaos. Drawing on his connection to the dark entity Nalzagoth, Matt summoned shadowy, eldritch tentacles to subdue the doctor. With the medical staff incapacitated by these supernatural forces, Matt turned the infirmary into a scene of grim spectacle. When a guard arrived to investigate the commotion, the rest of the party responded with overwhelming force: Havi launched a ballista bolt with unerring accuracy, taking down the unsuspecting soldier instantly. Mabel quickly reclaimed the guard’s uniform, ensuring the party was ready for their next move.

Prisoners Freed
With Deva’s scouting providing the exact coordinates of the captives, the team pushed forward to execute the liberation. After freeing the prisoners, they faced the daunting task of navigating back through the enemy camp. Mad Matt, whose appetite for carnage knows no bounds, nearly blew their entire cover. Havi saved the day with a classic piece of rugged improvisation, pretending to be profoundly drunk while carrying Matt in his arms. The ruse was just convincing enough to allow the group to slip past the remaining guards undetected.

Final Showdown
As they neared the perimeter, a guard recognized Mad Matt and attempted to intercept them. Havi’s display of drunken incompetence swayed the guard, who led them toward a secluded area. Seizing this golden opportunity, Havi used Mad Matt as a literal human battering ram, smashing into the guard with both Matt and his battleaxe. The ensuing brawl ended in a messy demise for the guard, but since they had run out of vomit to hide the evidence, Havi improvised by covering the remains with soup. The group slipped away into the night, leaving the chaos behind.

Wilma’s Reward
Returning to Fairview as victors, the adventurers were greeted by a relieved and grateful Wilma. True to her word and her contract, she handed over 80 gold pieces, including the original stolen amount plus the promised interest. She had also successfully recruited 12 eager interns for their ship - though only nine remained after hearing the full terms of employment, especially once Matt mentioned the requirement of pledging loyalty to Nalzagoth. With new allies and a fresh batch of recruits, the party departed Fairview, ready to pursue glory wherever it may lead.